Friday, January 21, 2011

Random Thoughts with Eazy

So every week I actually take notes for stuff that I think would be worth writing about, and if I can create a whole post about each of them, I do. Simple enough. Since this week has been pretty stale as far as the posting thanks to my current internet situation in East Jesus, VT, I figured I'd use some of the notes that I couldn't construct an entire post around and create a smorgasbord of content for the viewing public. Basically I just stole the idea from Matthes. So strap yourselves in, and let's take a little ride.

Carmichael is fat now. He's really embracing the NASCAR lifestyle to its fullest extent. He is stocky as a motherfucker, and is starting to take on the round shape, a la Snooki. He looks more and more like a bowling ball every week, and that black Monster shirt is not helping in his struggle.

Is Stroupe the next J-Law? Kid comes out in his heat and is really BROing for it, then doesn't even show up at the line for the main event? Dude, you at least have to try. Don't even tell me he was spent after an eight lap heat race. I mean he got a good two hours of rest thanks to FELD's incompetence at keeping the show moving along. There is no way he was too tired, and if he was, that is fucking pathetic.

Ralph Shaheen pisses me off.

What is up with Cole Seely this season? The guy is straight firing out there. Like, easily on the level of the big guys of the 250 class. He smoked Rattray, passed Tomac, and had Morais in the crosshairs once the race ended at Phoenix. He did well at Anaheim, too, so the man has clearly stepped up his game out there. This is a kid who pretty much came out of nowhere, other than being in Mini Warriors on a KX60 in 1997. He randomly got a day-ride with Factory Suzuki a couple of years ago, but other than that, he really didn't do anything. Then TLD decided to pick him up, again out of nowhere, but even still he wasn't on this level last year. Now he's factory material all day long. I'm on board, Seely is BROtocross team material (But not this week. +1, you know? Not the numbers I'd like to see).

God bless the privateers in the LCQs. They fit so perfectly into the show. That gap between the heats and the mains would be unbearable if it wasn't for Joey and his band of novices fucking bouncing off of each other in every damn turn trying their best to make it to the main where they will undoubtedly get last. Did you see the first turn for the 250 LCQ? That Raper kid was totally raping those jumps up until about the third one in the rhythm, then he pretty much spread his butt hole open and took it. Miraculously, he didn't get destroyed by everyone else out there, which seems to be a recurring instance in these LCQs. Those guys have a damn horseshoe up their asses, because they ride way over their heads on every inch of that track.

1 comment:

  1. What about those dickheads of a production crew on SPEED?

    I think we missed every exciting part of the heats because they like to play camera tag and show whoever is riding by themselves.