Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Now Monster Jam Is As Physically Demanding As Supercross?

If you watched the Phoenix show on SPEED, then you may very well have seen in the 35 hours of nonsense between the LCQs and the mains that they showed a small segment comparing supercross with monster truck racing/freestyle. In fact, there was actually a half hour show dedicated to exactly that on SPEED a couple of weeks ago. It's just pretty astonishing that people can actually think there's a solid comparison to be made there. I am so sick of hearing about how in shape fucking monster truck drivers and guys who do that type of shit (you know, with a steering wheel) have to be. You literally sit on your ass the whole time. And just look at the guy who is driving Grave Digger, the GOAT of monster trucks. Everything about that man screams "I shotgun beers with my actual shotgun." He's about as in shape as a high school linebacker at the 25th reunion. Not to mention that monster trucks honestly seem to require virtually no athletic skill beyond being able to coordinate turning the wheel with sipping your Budweiser. And don't even get me started on monster truck freestyle. It's nothing beyond steering towards a bus or a pile of cars and stepping on the gas. Then the announcers actually have to spin it so that it seems like whatever the purely incidental circumstance that follows is entirely what the driver meant to do. They actually showed an ad for Monster Jam a bunch of times, and one of the sound bytes that they decided was essential to their marketing strategy was "That's a sweet air". And Joey statement of the century goes to...

The whole sport is a huge joke. It's the mullet of motorsports (and most definitely the mullet capital of motorsports, as well).


  1. How does this sport have any money involved in it? Like granted the south sells out stadiums of this shit but if I remember the old ad's correctly it goes something like this "SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY. MONSTER JAM! KIDS SEATS ARE STILL JUST $6." ...Your're making money off a $6 ticket? Cause you know one dad is taking like 30 fuckin kids(20 of them being his, fucking hicks). And look at that truck. I'm not professional but I'd have to say thats a six figure venture between chassis, engine, wheels, graphic. Shit is ridiculous.

  2. I don't think they ever said that Monster truck driving was as physically demanding as Supercross. The one thing they did mention is how much abuse the drivers take in reguards to hits which is quite a bit. Tho not as much as poor Roczen. Yes, it was a lame comparison. I have to think there was marketing going on that made that happen. Anyway it does take balls and skill to drive those things sucessfully.

  3. monster trucks can monster blow me